7.14.2009

I haven't mentioned this before, I don't talk about family much outside the walls of our lovingly dubbed Sweet Haven, but my Cliff passed away on July 4 and I want to note his significance in my life. But it's hard to figure out what to say without sounding trite, so I just want to note it here for my own ability to begin processing.

We're surrounded by such excitement of new life in our house, that such a loss seems too conflicting to understand. Cliff was 93 and had health problems, so his death was no surprise, but still quite a loss for our family.

Then there is waking up to little hands pounding on one side of my inner belly, little feet stomping on the other side. Does she want out? Was she just having her own little personal dance party? How cute is it that when Charlie puts his face on my belly and talks a little bit she starts kicking up a storm?

She'll be taking her first trip up to the family lake house (obviously not able to see it!) for a gathering to honor and remember Cliff next weekend. It'll be a time for reconciling the emotions and hopefully she'll absorb some of the wonderful and strong love that is certain to be in the air that day.

All of this probably explains the sudden shift in decor, and all of the getaway themed internet finds I've been posting. Feeling changes and further understanding deep appreciation, knowing growing up and growing roots are not easy tasks.

Here's a little light hearted inspiration. . .we're still trudging along on the house, so I maintain my right to surf the web for images that might come in handy. These are: (Left) Cottage Living image via decorology. (Right) From Anna Betts' Colour and Sound via this very real, very pretty place. The whole house is adorable.

2 comments:

Caroline said...

I'm sorry for your loss.

I was 8 months pregnant when my grandma passed away... I, too, remember feeling conflicted about it. The saddest part was realizing she'd never meet her first great-granddaughter... but then it was hard to stay sad with all the baby excitement.

I hope your family memorial goes well.

Wolfie and the Sneak said...

Thank you, I look forward to the memorial and the chance to talk about him with other family members. I think that's an important part of the process and a great way to store up some funny stories for my little one later on down the line to honor his role in my life.